Your Path

I have learned, that it is through challenge and perseverance that what you dream will become yours.  I no longer believe that sitting around waiting for life to come to you is the answer.  Because its not.  It's dedication.  And I feel that this summer has been some sort of a wake up call for me.  Karma, or some higher entity telling me too look at my life, look where the path I am on is leading me, and see if that is where I want to end up.

To be completely honest, my current path is not leading me to where I want to be.  But I can't say that it is any ones fault, but my own.

Where I want to be, has little to no path, and that is because I am scared to start building it.  I know now, that if I stay on my current path, I will be unhappy.  So, to create my path, I need to do two things.

One: Practice at what I want to do for the rest of my life
and Two: Try, Fail, and Try Again until somehow you make it.

I do not want to one day look back at my life and regret my choices, or think "What if?".  I want to be able to say I tried, and if I fail, then I will say, I failed.  But I want to go after what I want to be, the person who I am inside, and see if maybe, just maybe, I can somehow live that life to the fullest.

I am darkened by realizing this, but I know that I will be able to move forward. At this moment, I feel as though I am trapped underground and unable to emerge into the light.  There is a quote from a book I read this summer, that summarizes what I feel.  It is in the book London Under by Peter Ackroyd:

A subterranean space may be the object of attraction as well as of fear. Healing wells and places of worship lie beneath the streets.  Like a mother, the lower deep may have a warm embrace.  It is a haven from the outside world.  It is a refuge from attack.  In the darkness you cannot be seen.